What does Islam say
about Domestic violence?
Islam condemns domestic violence. Once a
number of women came to the prophet, on whom be peace, to complain that
their husbands had beaten them. The prophet announced that men who beat
their wives are not good men. The prophet also said: Do not beat the
female servants of Allah.
Allah knows that life is not always a
bowl of cherries. And so He stipulates that a man must be kind to his wife
even if he happens to dislike her (Qur'an 4:19). Allah offers a good
reason as to why men should not dislike their wives. Allah says that He
has placed much good in women (Qur'an 4:19). In this regard the prophet
Muhammad, on whom be peace, said that no believing man should hold a
grudge against a believing woman. So what is a husband to do if he
dislikes some things about his wife? This is bound to occur, since no
human being is perfect. The prophet instructed that men should look for
the agreeable traits in their wives rather than focus on their faults.
(See Saheeh Muslim, chapter on advice relating to women).
The
prophet also advised men that if they wish to benefit from marriage they
should accept their wives as they are rather than try to straighten them
out and thus end up in divorce. In the following verse of the Qur'an,
Allah warns men that if they retain their wives in marriage it should not
be to take advantage of them. The verse reads: Retain them in kindness
or release them in kindness. But do not retain them to their hurt so that
you transgress (the limits). If anyone does that he wrongs his own soul.
Do not take God's instructions as a jest (Qur'an 2:231).
Once the
prophet, on whom be peace, was asked what are the obligations of husbands
toward their wives. He replied: Feed her when you eat, and provide her
clothing when you provide yourself. Neither hit her on the face nor use
impolite language when addressing her (See Mishkat, chapter on the
maintenance of women).
The prophet equated perfect belief with good
treatment to one's wife when he said: The most perfect believer is one
who is the best in courtesy and amiable manners, and the best among you
people is one who is most kind and courteous to his wives (see Tirmidhi,
chapter on the obligations of a man to his wife).
Finally, the
prophet, the best example of conduct said: The best among you is the
one who treats his family best.
Some of the last words of the
prophet delivered during the farewell pilgrimage enjoins that men should
hold themselves accountable before Allah concerning the question of how
they treat their wives. Therefore his advice to all men, is as
follows: You must treat them with all
kindness. |